In the Defense of Sexy

My social media is full of memes right now that stress the importance of finding a man who loves and not lusts after you. Find one who kisses your forehead and not your lips (okay, that one I don't even get. My husband kissed me on the forehead yesterday and it made me laugh). Find one who cherishes you, not desires you. And if that's not bad enough, it's also full with blog posts that tell me I shouldn't be wearing yoga pants because it might make random men *sarcastic frighten voice* find me sexy. The blogs make this seem like the worst fait in the world. But, really, when did someone finding me attractive become something to be afraid of?

And while I shake my head and laugh these off, I realize they pose a societal problem. We're teaching women they shouldn't want passion, desire, or to be seen as sexy. Yes, you should want your mate to love, cherish, and adore you. But one set of emotions isn't exclusive of the other. You can love the person you lust after. Just because you desire a person doesn't mean you can't cherish them as well. As to the yoga pants, I can't control what other people think about me and even if I could-what's wrong with someone finding me sexy? It's too much pressure. And, at the end of the day, we're just making ourselves miserable.

Obviously every relationship and every person is different. I appreciate that. Some people don't want sexy in their life. I'm good with that. But please don't push your ideas onto the next generation. I'm a confident woman who's been married for eighteen years (this November) and the meme's and posts have an affect on me. I start to question myself. I can only imagine the affect they have on younger women who are in a new relationship.