Recently, my hubby and I were walking through the mall when
something caught my eye and made me snicker. Walking toward us was a woman,
probably late fifties, wearing a loose pink half top and jeans, which, okay,
isn’t so bad I suppose…if she’d been wearing a bra. I know how cumbersome bras
are and I will admit I go without one as often as I can. Nothing like feeling
the cool air on your boobies and having the freedom to let it all just hang
out. But…this woman’s breasts were long and saggy and came only about an inch
from the hem of the shirt. As she’s walking past us, those saggy boobies are
swaying too and fro. Woman power!! Yeah!! Yet I couldn’t help but snicker. I
can’t help but sing the song, ‘Do your boobs hang low, do they wiggle to and
fro’ to myself.
Years ago my hubby was driving down a not so safe area of
the city. It's not unusual to see a hooker sway up to a car then slip inside.
At the same time, you have a store being robbed at knifepoint two blocks down.
Anyway. Hubby was driving along, came to a stop at a red light and casually
glances to his left and what does he see? An old wrinkled woman, whip up her
baggy shirt and flash him her oversized hanging to her knees boobs. He was
traumatized. LOL I love teasing him about it still. It’s funny to watch his
face turn read, or see him shutter.
I know, I know. As long as the person is comfortable with
their body or themselves, it shouldn’t matter what they wear or how they look.
But lord, sometimes it just makes you want to chuckle. Like what the hell is up with kids wearing
their underwear over their clothes? How is that right? There is a reason they
are called “underwear” But no, they think they're cool strutting along wearing
jeans with boxer shorts or tight-whities over their pants. Or wearing a lacy
white bra over a dark t-shirt. I could be in the worst mood, wanna bite someone’s
head off yet when I see something like that, I can’t help but snicker. I
suppose I should thank them for lifting their mood. Now wouldn’t that be a
riot. “Excuse me young man. I would just like to say thank you for making me
chuckle when I was in the most foul mood..” Oh and don’t get me started on seeing guys
walking around with their jeans hanging past their butt cheeks showing off
their grungy underwear. All I want to do to them is walk up behind them and
yank those shorts up so high they sing soprano for a year. When my middle son was young he thought he
was cool wearing his pants past his butt. I got tired of telling him to pull up
his pants, so I decided one day to give him a piece of his own medicine. I
yanked my pants past my waist, let them hang down all baggy, letting my bright
pink panties showing over top. He was repulsed. “Now you know how I feel.” I
warned him that every time I saw his pants below his waist, I would do the
same, and next time I may even wear a thong. I won!!! From that day on, he wore
his shirts, long and baggy, covering his low riding pants. Okay, maybe I didn’t
completely win, but he is now a very snappy dresser.
So, the next time you see someone dressed ridiculously, or
someone with their boobies hanging out, casually walk up to them and just say
thank you. You’ll have them wondering for hours. LOL
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